Good Morning!

First off ,I wanted to first start out to tell you that I am by no means a morning person. Coffee and a shower are usually my go to things for waking up and a little music (Enter Sandman) helps too. Today though, today was different my lovely daughter who likes to get up super early was full of energy and I was the walking mommy zombie. She doesn’t mind apparently lol.

Now I am sitting here with my cup of delicious jolt of a cup and  so many ideas are running through my head. I just had to start write…I had a thirst for it. I think every since having my children I am starting to become a morning person…naw only some days . So we are sitting in the same room one is on the tablet watching you-tube videos and while I get to write like a bandit. Actual mommy time…so crazy, I must be in a dream!

What I really should be doing is my to do list for the day but, for some reason I its not that important to me right now. I feel like procrastinating a bit. To treat myself to some alone time while I can before the boys wake up. Does this make feel like a bad house maiden… sometimes. I have to make time for myself right. Like in the movie Moms night out said “I need to have my oxygen mask to help others.” I have been starting to live my life just like that and you know what I have noticed that I am not such an uptight, angry at the world edgy person anymore or at least lessened a bit. So it’s very true you need to work on yourself before you help others. I tend to forget about myself and then become pretty drained and ragged. With no energy to do anything and with three kids, a dog and a hubby that’s a big NO No!

So I will leave you all with another quote of inspiration that I am also living by…

Love

Sitting here drinking my twisted tea. Able to finally relax to let the words roll out.  HAHAHA yeah right! Not with the beautiful crazy life that I have. I look at the word love and it has many meanings for it.  I look at the word love and I see many visions from my minds eye. Of a mother and a baby cuddling on the couch in the early morning because the baby was hungry and it wasn’t day break yet. Yet, the unconditional love is there. I also an elderly couple walking down a park path hand in hand with the years never even touching their love that’s going strong.

All beautiful visions … we all want this .. right?? I know  I do.

Everyone breaks right??

          Yes! It’s a very healthy thing to do. Especially after the exquisite calm that returns after blowing your top. Well today that’s what I felt like after disciplining two little boys that just loves to push my buttons. Now to give you a little idea of what I saw when I walked over to the kids room. I saw so many red flags (as I call them) My daughter is trying to climb up a ladder that we have for the bunk beds. The reason why it’s not on their bunk beds well lets just say a headache of mine that was realized when my daughter keeps going up to the top bunk. With me knowing that I will never ever be there on time when she falls off that darn thing. Which she has.

          I know that every kids goes through this but, I am someone like to try too prevent things as much as I can.  Well anyways she was climbing up the stairs and then I saw my boys trying to pull her down because she isn’t supposed to be on there. She lets go and all three goes backward and the boys are cushion at this time but, then she some how bounces back up just to hit her head on to the dresser drawer. Now seeing this in obviously in a faster mode where I can’t react as fast I wanted to. After all this just happened I turned into the incredible hulk. Boy my kids are scared of me now… I finally let out everything that was bothering me, what I was feeling, all the stress and pull from this world that I live in all the while the tears are running down my face and I feel my body temperature about to the red line. Yeah! You know the feeling. I mean everyone does. So now I feel like the worst mother not only that person in the world because of the way I made the kids coward under me. What a day!